Happy Birthday Princess Pandita!!!

I love you tons!

Even though I can't be there to celebrate with you, know that I am here thinking of you and am with you in spirit!

Happy Birthday...

xox-

Princess Annush!

A happy thought :)

To my friend:

I know what I said and now I think that maybe I shouldn't have said it. Or at least not in that way.

I can only imagine how you must be feeling...

You were dealt a crappy hand and I wish I could help you fix it but I can't. I wish I could help you justify it to yourself but I can't do that either.

All I can say is that you did what you felt you HAD to do...and regrettable though it may be, at the time it's what you HAD to do and then did.

Life goes on though. Your life at least. And cutting it short is not an option just because you feel ashamed. People go through this all the time and people like us don't approve of it but it doesn't necessarily make it wrong...everyone is different and circumstances change.

I love you. A lot of people love you. It may not be what you need to hear. It may never be enough to replace what you purposely lost. It may not change things. But it's something that should be enough of a reason to make you want to live. It should make you want to be better so that next time you can be better.

It is easy to say "I would never" "Nobody should ever" "This is wrong". But nothing is ever easy even when you want it. When you are in a position to play the cards and do it well. I didn't realize this before and I am sorry if I caused you more anguish than you already felt.

I am sorry you had to go through this.

But like everything else, I hope this is a lesson learned and a reason to stay alive...because if nothing else, you have the rest of your life to be better than the person you were the other day.

xox-
ana

i wish he would have understood this...

*sigh*
I am going to go see Shrek now...

"For Dogs who flew in World War I and understand a little French."

Lately I've been overcome by the desire to write but haven't had enough time to do it which is probably the reason why I want to do it...No, really...I've actually had a lot of stuff going on including but not limited to time wasted introducing random people to the world of Snoopy (and I didn't think there was anyone in this planet who didn't know Snoopy), my new addiction to Venezuelan arepas, hours and hours spent at airports at times when I am convinced I should have brought my passport, and wine.

Of course there is work and all the other good stuff but it's hard to focus on EVERYTHING.

My friend has become a sushi chef and a sushi roll was named after me/inspired by me..."The Princess Roll". I thought it was cute that people knew right away it was made for me. I wish I could have tried it... Better yet, I wish I could feed Princess rolls to those people whose mouth I appreciate near me...

One day I will...

For now though, I can feel summer coming. Miami is becoming a crappy place to spend the summer in. I have 6 electronic tickets waiting in my inbox to help me keep my sanity during the next few months. Just knowing that they exist makes me all warm and fuzzy inside.

I miss certain things. I miss certain people.

I feel like I should dance.

Happy Mother's Day!

I love you mom!

appropriate...

Back to bed

I HATE sharing my bed more than anything in the entire world, unless of course there is a damn good reason to have someone invading my personal sleeping space. There is only one good reason I can think of that is entirely acceptable. Even then, that has its share of exclusions and limitations. You do the math.

I appreciate cold sheets, a monopoly over the pillows and jurisdiction over the comforter. Sounds easy but in reality it is a nightmare when there is someone there. People can't control their body heat any more than they control the desire to takeover at least one of my perfectly fluffy pilows or my love affair with my comforter.

Frankly, it pisses me off. However, for a long time I overlooked this obsession of mine and felt good about sharing my pillows with someone I felt (feel?!) really deeply about. Then that was over and now I am back to my selfish sleep mode, which for at least a few weeks was the only thing I found positive in my new situation.

Lately though I've found that the reasons why I appreciate to be alone in bed are starting to bother me. Now I get too cold at night. I feel like I own way too many pillows. I wake up in the middle of the night tangled up in the mess that is my comforter. And it couldn't have come at a worse time...I promised myself that I would focus on me for a while and it seems like the only thing I can focus on to get myself on track is finding someone to fight over the comforter.

Each day older that I get, the more I am convinced that people really aren't meant to be alone...

Stupid girls

Overheard in Starbucks:

"I would never have a relationship with a woman who was not wearing underwear the first time we hooked up"

I would like to thank Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan and Britney Spears for lowering the bar so incredibly low that now underwear is a desireable attribute and a deal maker/breaker in a potential relationship!

It is very possible that I may get shit for saying this, just as it is very possible that many people will agree with me when I say this but I AM GLAD PARIS IS GOING TO JAIL, I AM GLAD LINDSAY'S MOVIES ARE BOMBING and I AM GLAD BRITNEY IS GOING INSANE! Frankly, I think the world can do without those three for a while...

Should I even admit to this?

"Cuando me besaste, me ansteciaste la boca!"

I don't write as much as I used to anymore and if at first it was because I had nothing to say, and then because I promised myself I'd respect my privacy, now it is because I am slowly but surely building a life...or more specifically, having a social life.

Finally, I have come to make a few good buddies. My personal drama has diminished greatly. Old friends and new friends are connected and the fact that I've seen both regularly these past few weeks makes me happy. Sometimes I have found myself torn between where I am and where I want to be but when I am okay with where I am [and that's exactly where I want to be] I feel invincible.

My curtains are up and with them I've learned to close myself off to haters. There will always be haters and you can't beat yourself up over what other people think. You just gotta' keep on swimming and doing your own thing and if something bothers you, just close the curtains!!

And sometimes, you have to stop being afraid and open the curtains. I spent the past month obsessing over the bad. Then when I had the chance to explain myself I was so freaked out that I almost couldn't. But then I opened myself up to the possibility that it could possibly be good [or it was more like I was pressured into believing that it would be]. And it was. Sometimes things change, but just because they are different, it doesn't mean they are bad. It simply depends on the circumstances...