Tonight I thought it would be cool to "hang with the boys".
Maybe I should rewind a little bit...I have been a med student for a semester and two weeks- basically, all of this year. During this time, in my partying mostly, I have had the pleasure of befriending a number of almost doctors and medical students at my level. I have met most of them partying and all of them (no exception) have been guys. Great looking guys at that!
On the most part, I've hung out with them accidentally in party settings and then individually either at school or at their homes. Never together. Never in an environment that was somewhat party-somewhat "vitrina".
Well, today I thought it would be cool to hang out with all of them together at the 809k party. I don't know what I was thinking. Seriously.
One of three things can happen when hanging out with a group of single good-looking guys:
1. They will smother you. If one or more of the aforementioned guys like you, there will be no air to breathe. They will be stuck to you like gum on your shoe. then, you will either go home alone or not but until then, you are eye AND arm candy.
2. They will use you as a wingwoman. Because we all know that nothing attracts a woman (or man) more than another good looking woman (or man).
3. They will be out looking to hook up and only want you there to accent the fact that they can hold friendships with women- but they ignore you nonetheless. It makes guys look good to have friendships with girls and they will use you as an asset but leave you hanging.
Tonight I saw sides of personalities I hadn't seen.
Theoretically, I was hanging out with 4 guys: crush #1, crush #2, and two new friends.
With crush #1 I have had "moments" but nothing has ever happened with him aside the whole "damsel in distress incident" I don't care to get into. With him, I went through item #1 of my aforementioned list, but like I said, nothing happened.
With crush #2, in a...errrr...moment of weakeness, we smooched. It wasn't anything dramatic, but after that, I also went though that same item #1 with him. He gets threatened (or awed) when crush #1 is around because crush #1 is like Buddha on a mountain even for him.
The other two guys I have just been friends with and I agreed to be their wingwoman even before we actually hung out.
Tonight, I experienced items #2 and #3, though mostly #3. It's a shitty feeling.
I went to the party, and I left. I went back at an ungodly hour because crush #2 especifically asked me. Originally, I went to the party to pick up my ticket and to see crush #1, but there was something about the way he acted towards me that made me want to give that up. Apparently, after the "damsel in distress incident" now he feels all older-brotherly towards me and God knows I don't need a new brother. Crush #2, made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside because there is nothing better than knowing that someone likes you. And he wanted me there, or so he said.
Well, I went back. We danced, had a drink. And maybe my friend was right when she said that I don't act like I like people. That I played the hard to get game more like impossible to get. Regardless, I became the girl to make them ALL look good.
Needless to say, five minutes into that, I grabbed my keys and left.
I ain't fucking Cupid.