Wednesday, January 10, 2007

say it right.

In less than 48 hours I am going to be Miami's newest resident. AGAIN.

I'm trying not to think about it too much but since there are so many things tied into a move, obviously I have to. And when I do, even though I am certain that this is something that needs to be done and that I actually want to do, I get nervous and as a result I start feeling nauseaus and dizzy and my head hurts and I start to sneeze. Not a pretty sight at all.

I obsess about things like not liking my job, or the people at my job, not finding the perfect place to live, buying a car with crappy gas mileage, all the humidity, the Cubans, my shortage of friends in the area, not having a gym membership, remaining smoke-free, not losing the 6 pounds I've gained, HWMNBN screwing me over, HWMNBN not screwing me over, the inability to find my way by just looking for the nearest body of water, $15 drinks, nobody to go have drinks with, too much Starbucks, too much gluten...it doesn't end...it's like my brain goes into overdrive and then I can't even think straight. It's like all the redbulls I had the night of Adrian's birthday are still in my system but the exhilaration (or acceleration) only comes when I think of Miami.

...because this is yet another thing I said I'd never do...

3 comments:

ANNINA said...

GET A GRIP ANNUSH F. A GO GO...LOVE YA!!!

Anonymous said...

Ana,
Sinceramente que no entiendo que una mujer inteligente, sofisticada y de tanto mundo (en el buen sentido de la palabra) continue planeando su vida al rededor de un tipo que, por lo que tu misma has dicho, no le importas.
Si un tipo te dice que puede "salir" con otras parejas,
Evidente y claramente, no le importas.
Como dije, eres actractiva, inteligente, aunque aveces un poco presumida, simpatica.
Entonces?? Por que tratar de forzar algo que no esta.
Uno no elige a quien amar. Y el no te ama.
Le despiertas cariƱo, tal vez lujuria.
Pero mo te ama.

Move on, give yourself another chance to find someone worthy.

Best Regards,

Amanda.


PS: ha y no soy anonimo. no tengo blog.

annush said...

Amanda,

HWMNBN y yo desde hace un tiempo ya somos amigos y nada mas. Nada de esto tiene nada que ver con el. En este case solo hablo de su apoyo moral.

I'll find someone else eventually. I know this. I want this. It just makes me feel better that I can count on someone like him because if maybe he was a terrible boyfriend, he has been an excellent friend.