The fact is that this week I've been back in NYC, that saying keeps resonating in my head. I am not entirely sure of where I heard it the first time, but I find it to be very wise. Some people think of certain decisions/ choices as absolutes or repetitions but in reality, each decision/ choice is different because YOU are different. Every experience changes us.
I left New York about 4 years ago and hadn't been back in almost 2.
I was tired. The concrete jungle where dreams are made of, made my dreams come true but it wore me out. Towards the end, I felt detached from it. But I am not the same as I was back then and neither is the city.
So I am in love again.
When I tell the story of how I ended up in Brickell, people often laugh at me because I chose it due to the fact that it was like a mini Manhattan in the middle of the obnoxiousness and tackiness I find Miami to be. Like an oasis. I also think that in some strange way, Brickell chose me. I moved in at a time when that squared mile didn't really have a personality as it was merely a concept being executed so I became part of its story.
But as I sit here in a Starbucks 1000 miles away from "my" Starbucks, in a space that just 4 years ago was occupied by the now defunct Blockbuster, I think that maybe this is where I should be right now. That perhaps being the Jersey girl who moved to the city is more in line with who I am, than being the city girl who moved to Miami.
Even in writing it seems like a step back!
(no offense to Miami)
In any case, should the roads lead me back here I know that I'll have to rediscover the city and rediscover myself in it because again, going back to where you started is not the same as never leaving.