Positano...8 more weeks and off I go!

Just Like a Star!

The lovely Daniela came to Miami earlier this year to spend time with me and catch up. It had been a good two years since we had last seen each other. Not since I went to London for Gus's college graduation had we been together and even though we always have an amazing time, there is something about time and distance that makes it more comfortable to live without someone. Here is yet another of example of distance not making the heart grow fonder but just making it numb.

Then there is also the thing about being connected that makes time fly by faster. How can I miss her if I know what she is doing, who she is dating, where she is, etc? How can I miss someone I have on speed dial?

Anyway, when she came down to Miami, we had an amazing time and she made me promise I would go back to Europe soon. When she left I missed her terribly.

I think the universe knew I missed her terribly too (and that I needed a break)because as it happened, I was told that I had 2 weeks to use up some vacation days I had left over, the fine people of American Airlines had Europe on sale and for once I had no reason to say no.

So I left and as expected, I had so much fun I didn't want to come back.

Also during this short break to London I met someone I first met through this blog. Even though we have somehow kept in touch for years and had come close to meeting but hadn't, I never thought the day would come when we would really be face to face.

Of course, we all know what happens every time I say "never"…
In this case what happened was that Annush met Schuey.

Although I could talk about a number of things that happened throughout the evening (all positive as he was a delightful date) there were three things that stick out:

1. We met at The Ritz in London. I arrived first and he arrived like 2 minutes later. He had told me that he would know who I was. I didn't think he would and worse yet, I didn't think I would recognize him. But we recognized each other before we were even in the other's personal space and then when we kissed hello there was no miscalculation as to the number of kisses, the side we were kissing first and there was definitely for sure no awkward cheek bone bump.


2. My favorite word (enthusiastic) is part of his vocabulary.


3. The lining of his jacket really did match his shirt which really did have his initials along the cuff.

I must admit that if the stars aligned properly and if given the chance, this is someone I would want to spend time with. Date? I don't know…probably not…but this is someone I would want to have around me simply because around him I don't feel so awkward. He is someone who makes me feel like I am and not how I should be.

Yeah, I liked him. So what?

I often wondered if anything good would ever come out of this blog that more often than not only seems to cause me grief and aggravation. When I started writing here, I thought I would find clarity but I haven't. I have, however, found some cool people to call friends.

I was thankful for a lot...

The "waaa waaa weee waaah crew": Freedom of the Seas edition.

To be better...

I HAVE SOCIAL DISEASE.

I HAVE TO GO OUT EVERY NIGHT.

IF I STAY HOME ONE NIGHT,

I START SPREADING RUMORS TO MY DOGS.

-Andy Warhol

Apparently people care that I haven't been writing these days.

I have actually been considering quitting the whole blogging thing and focusing on sharing less of myself and doing more things for myself. Taking care of business as one would say. But you know, it's kinda hard to quit when the experience is so cathartic. And to be quite frank, I need that sometimes.

Last week I went on a cruise (obviously not the one that sank). I spent seven glorious days exploring the ports of Cozumel, Grand Cayman, Montego Bay and Lavadee (for the fifth time). On the most part, it was good. But oh! the hangovers! Funny how when at sea drunkenness helps you preserve your balance and 15 drinks only feel like 3.

But I've since stopped that- the drinking that is.

I've been giving it a lot of thought and I've come to the conclusion that I need to control my drinking. Perhaps I don't drink so much that it should be considered a problem; however, in the past couple of weeks I've fucked up royally because I've been drunk.

I lost HWMNBN- this time for good because my judgement was impaired. And I could blame him for buying my drinks or for steering me in the wrong direction or for making me forget things that feel good to remember; but in the end, the one trying to keep up with him was me. The one who thought she was invincible was me. The one who believed she was right because "it felt right at the time" was me- even though I may have been dead wrong.

I worked so hard for something for so many years, and I lost it in 10 minutes.

Maybe I needed this to put an end to this whole ordeal. I just wish it hadn't ended as it did.

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For those who care, I've now been alcohol free for 5 days.