Monday, March 21, 2005

want a husband? have a baby!

You can't make someone love you. People either love you or they don't. Seems easy enough, right? Lately I've heard quite a few stories about girls getting pregnant to tie a guy down. In some of of the stories I have heard there is a secret wish for marriage involved and then in some others there is the hope that the guy will miraculously fall in love her just because she is the mother of his child. I know this is something that has been done since the beginning of time, but it doesn't take away from the face that this is just wrong.

I can't imagine for the life of me why someone in their right mind would put themselves in that situation to tie down a guy. Seriously, why would anyone want to be with someone who doesn't want to be with them to begin with? I, for one, would rather be alone. Hell, you wait around long enough and you are bound to find someone who will care for you and will want to have a family with you. Things don't usually work out when people try to force them into being.

People who don't want children shouldn't be having kids. At the end of the day it is those kids who end up screwed. People who want children but are only having them because they think that's the way to get the guy are being selfish and will ultimaly be doubly screwed because who is to say that the guy will even care?

If someone loves you, they'll love you for who you are not because you are some kind of baby making machine. By attempting to tie someone down the hard way, you are only lying to yourself. You can't make someone love you and by putting someone in the position of having to be with you against their will is both selfish and cruel. And no matter what the one who'll end up most affected by this is the baby.

It bothers me that some women's irresponable behavior give the rest of us a bad name. It pisses me off to know that there are kids running around there completely uncared for simply because their mom messed up and dad didn't care. It saddens me to know that there are people out there who really think that you can force love into being. Some people just don't understand that forever can be too long.

8 comments:

Reda said...

Being honest? I'll really put in doubt the intelligence of any girl trying to tie a guy down with a baby. It's been a while since the last time I heard one of those stories, but Im sure that the situation is repeated over and over not only there, but here in DR too. A lot.

mrsmogul said...

The Europeans have babies without being married! It's the norm. The teens get great benefits if they get pregnant. They get a home and payments forever!!!

annush said...

YOu know back when I used to live in Germany I used to date a guy who was 24 years old and was still receiving Kindergeld. I thought that was awesome. I really do hope that whenever I have a baby, that he/she is a European baby :)

Gabemaster said...

You are my kind of girl hehe

red said...

my first love -- the only love of my life just had this happen to him. the baby was born a couple of days ago -- and guess what? he still doesn't want to be with her. her plan failed miserably, and now there is a child in the world that has to deal with a broken home. i think it is completely immature and selfish to devise a plan like that.

Chelle said...

i totally agree. doing that also shows low self esteem. people have to value themselves more. you cannot put your worth on having or not having another person. anyway, you can share your life, but you can never own someone else.

Robert W. said...

As someone who has a baby with someone whom I didn't want to marry, I think you're right. I didn't marry her. She gets financial support, but I also call the shots on most of her life. Obviously its not that hard to find someone who wants kids. Why trick some guy who will just resent you for it.

ducklet said...

i agree, this is no way to have a child. except me, cause i think that's how i arrived on the planet ;)

but from NOW ON, totally, no more having kids to tie a man down.