Today is ugly girl's birthday (only I can call her ugly girl)...She is turning 19 (really 26). In celebration, she is having a masquerade party tonight for 150 of her closest friends, in a place I've never been to. The evite requests that the party goers wear black. I gotta' go shopping.
It is also Valeria's birthday...she is turning 26 either in Hamburg or in Quito...
And Jenny's birthday as well...She is turning 23 somewhere in Maryland (unless she is in Frankfurt).
HAPPY BIRTHDAY GIRLS!!
Due to the weather conditions in good ole' Santo Domingo this week (rain, rain and even more rain), I've spent the better part of the week chilling at home. I know that I had been craving some relaxation and sleep but I kinda' miss some of the excitement of last week.
The highlights of my life these days have been:
1. trying to put together a business plan for the worse business imaginable
2. going to the hairdressesr (i love the hairdresser!)
3. shopping for ugly girl's birthday gift
4. trying to translate the names of spices so that I can cook.
Today my project is leg waxing and dress buying.
I know that as a good New Yorker I own enough black clothes that I would make Trent Reznor proud; however, I am on a mission to look extra nice today. This is the first time in years (about 5 years) I am going to be in a confined space with pretty much every Dominican I've ever befriended. A lot has happened in those 5 years.
In retrospect I should have kept in touch better so that tonight I wouldn't have to try so hard. Oh well!
Or I could pretend I'm someone else...chances are that with a mask over my eyes and obscene amounts of make-up nobody will know it's me :)
...but the last time I played one of those role playing games...hahaha...it took me a while to get back to being myself...though my alter ego was so much more fun!
If worse comes to worse at least I'll have my entourage...hahaha
I miss Starbucks a lot these days. Here it's a real pain in the ass to find a latte just the way you want it without going so far as making it myself. I've found a bakery/cafe that makes awesome coffee and has yummy treats, though it's not exactely in my neighborhood: Panavi. It would be great if they delivered.
It's too early and I've writen a lot about nothing. I think later I'll come back and write about something of substance like Dan's theory that people who live at home until marriage live an "unrealistic life and are by-products of the ritzy life scene".
I love Dan, but sometimes his narrow mindedness makes me want to beat him up.
Actually, I'll just make my peace with that now:
A couple of days ago, Dan sent me a link to an article written by who I presume is nothing more than a bitter, ugly woman bashing the generation of women who came about as a result of Sex and the City. I was only supossed to read the first two paragraphs, so I read just that. Anyway, I found the article to be a personal attack on the women of my generation so I wrote him back:
"I think that the success of Sex and the City was in that it celebrated female friendship in a stylish way without ever giving all the power to a man. It was about time this happened if you ask me! I think that the women who could enjoy expensive wardrobes did well before S&TC and hotties usually band together...But when I did see it [ S&TC], I saw an older version of myself and of most of the women I know (...) enjoying a productive friendship and living life on THEIR terms. That was the kind of life I expected (and still do) to have in my late 30's. My priorities have never involved being a plane Jane with monofacetic friendships. If this makes women unbearable then men have been unbearable all along."
So then he responded with the following:
"this wasn't a dig at you it was a social commentary of the unrealistic life that most of the young Manhattanites (both male and female) seem to be driven by. This includes people who despite being in their late twenties through mid thirties for the most part lived a rent/ expense free existence while driving new (and sometimes) fancy cars, going out clubbing all of the time, and not batting an eye at a $100 bottle of wine during dinner. These are the types of people who live an unrealistic illusion. These are also the bi- product of the ritzy bar scene. It is not you."
So I said:
"In defense of those families...I don't think they live an unrealistic illusion. It is simply a cultural thing. In my culture people don't leave home until they are married either. "
That got me no response.
And no response bugs me more than a bad response because it shows me that he really believes this and he is not willing to discuss it.
In my culture it is expected that you'll live at home until you get married. In recent years this has changed because people are not getting married as young as they used to and for a number of other reasons; but staying home is by no means an unrealistic illusion or something that's even frowned upon. Hell, in my book an unrealistic illusion is to go out into the world and be broke all the time, having to live with a stranger or being entirely alone- unless you ABSOLUTELY have to!
I left home at 19 and have been back for short periods of time since, but I left because of geography not because I believe in the "unrealistic illusion".
I think it is an "unrealistic ilussion" to think that you are a better person if you leave home so you can impress the Dan types as opossed to the one person who lives at home, and leads a quality life. At least in my culture, we are raised to help the family and to keep the family running as a unit until other units are created. We think as a group. And for better or for worse I like it better that way.